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Aankhein

Posted by shiwuz on April 25, 2008

Jhalakte hai un aankho mein maikhaane kai baar

Chhalakte hai un aankho se paimaane kai hazaar

Panapte hai un aankho mein aashiq beqarar

Khilte hai unhe dekh kar ye gulshan ye gul-e-gulzar

Daras ko un aankho k taras jaati hoon mein

Karti rehti hoon har dum buss un aankho ka intezar

Ab to na soch baaki hai na samajh baaki hai mujhme

Kar jo nahi sakti mein un aankho ka ikhtiyaar

Hothon par sajte rehte hai aksar kuch tanha tanha naghme

Un aankho k bina ab aata hai na chein aur na hi karaar

Aawaam mein zaya karti hoon mein soone se ye lamhe

Un aankho k bina nindiya bhi aane se karti hai inkaar

Kabhie meri khabar na mile to kehna unko, wo padhle zara akhbaar

Wo jo na mile to nikla hoga kahin meri maut ka bhi ishtihaar

8 Responses to “Aankhein”

  1. Nikhil's avatar

    yaake said

    I can almost feel those eyes!! 🙂
    Good work, keep it up! But don’t scare me like the way you have through the last line of this poem!! I won’t read the papers!! 😀
    http://mirrorcracked.wordpress.com

  2. Nikhil's avatar

    yaake said

    You’ve been tagged!
    http://mirrorcracked.wordpress.com

  3. shiwuz's avatar

    shiwuz said

    @ Yaake,

    No worries!! And I am working on my assignment, give me some time…

    ——————————————————-Tagged?!

  4. Nikhil's avatar

    yaake said

    Yeah!!!
    Go to this post:

    Tagged!!

    Answer all the questions in your own way and tag five other people… 😀
    It’s like a chain… 😀

  5. Didnt really lke this work, da! Looks like an obvious effort made in fitting that list of rhyming words you must have had on paper… gives an essence of some forceful imbursement done to extend an (supposedly) interesting thought of your mind, which (unfortunately) resulted into a not-so-interesting production of prose… quite amateur… because it was from you, that is why the amateur stuff cant be appreciated… sorry honey.. for the harsh usage of words… but this shouldn’t dismay your expedition of an ascending panache in writing… Yes please ?

    …pEace!

  6. shiwuz's avatar

    shiwuz said

    @ Yaake…

    Got it!

    @ Viral Affection…

    I am utterly surprised… not because you did not like it, but its crazy how you made out that this is an amateur’s work!! this infact is one of the first poetries that i wrote… so indeed i was (and still am) an amateur, a very natal state!! surprised at how you could recognize the difference, surprised at ur capacity to distinguish the age of an artist’s relation to his/her art academy!!

    infact, I am the happiest to read your comment, happier than I would be if you dint use the assuming-ly ‘harsh’ words…

    Yes definitely!!

  7. Rajesh's avatar

    Rajesh said

    A beautiful lovely poem. The last lines in particular are the best.

  8. shiwuz's avatar

    shiwuz said

    @ Rajesh,

    Long time Dad, thanks a lot!

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